Coming on the back of a bad day, Rien’s phone call at a time Shinji knew was far too early in the morning was the last straw. He couldn’t go back to sleep and instead sat in the spa for two hours until it was late enough that he could call in sick, and then he crawled back into bed before Hyun-ki could wake up and see that he was quickly falling apart.

His head throbbed horribly, he snapped whenever Kippei or Rien so much as glanced in his direction and he couldn’t seem to stop himself from spiralling into ‘alien Shinji mode’, which only upset him more. It wasn’t even as though it was unexpected; Shinji had been waiting for it for weeks now, but it didn’t seem to matter how well he prepared himself, he was never ready for it when it came.

Rien had a new assignment. And Shinji was terrified.

Rien wasn’t too happy about it himself, to be honest. It seemed every time he went back out into the field he liked it less and less. He was going to have to quit, and he knew it, but for the time being it was still more expedient to keep working. Getting out for good was going to be a hell of a process, and he wasn’t looking forward to that, either.

And he didn’t know what to say to Shinji when every little thing seemed to be stressing him out like crazy. Rien couldn’t give him any reassurance.

Hyun-ki was even quieter than usual, tiptoeing around with her thumb in her mouth, looking worried. She wanted to get Shinji hugs like normal, but she didn’t want him to snap at her too.

Shinji could hear her, walking past the closed bedroom door, the small shadow and pitter patter of her feet every five minutes or so until he couldn’t take it any more and the next time he heard her he got up, petting his hair down as best he could and straightening his clothes before opening the door and scooping her up without a word, hugging her close and kissing the top of her head, going out to find Kippei and Rien, finding them in the kitchen. He didn’t bother trying to say anything, walking straight to Kippei and then into him, hiding in against his chest and letting the scent of him soothe as best it could.

Kippei hugged them both as best he could, smiling a little wryly and kissing Yuni’s temple while he stroked Shinji’s hair.  He didn’t say anything either, having learned that for the moment, anything he said was more likely to make things worse than to help.

Hyun-ki clung tight to Shinji, whimpering a little worriedly because even though Shinji was holding her now something still seemed wrong, he wasn’t acting like normal and she didn’t know what was going on. She was afraid to ask, simply burrowing in and hanging on desperately.

Rien watched them all silently and shook his head, sighing a little and going over to make hot chocolate for everybody. That could surely make them feel better, even now.

Shinji smelt it before he realised what Rien was doing, then he just smiled gratefully but didn’t move away from Kippei’s side, feeling tired and unstable and just wanting him close.

“I don’t want to go to school today.” He knew he would snap if he went, and that would definitely be bad. “Can I stay home?”

“Yeah, baby, you can,” Kippei agreed, half inclined to say he would stay too, but knowing that it would be worse after Rien actually left and he would need to take some days off then, and better to miss as few as possible. Unlike Shinji, he didn’t have the entire courseload memorized already.

“Chocolate!” Hyun-ki whispered excitedly as Rien brought it over, handing them each a steaming mug. “Shinji, chocolate make better?” she asked worriedly, still whispering.

“Yeah,” Shinji agreed softly, going over to sit at the table so he couldn’t spill his cup on her, snuggling her close and kissing her cheek, grateful for something so completely innocent to just snuggle. “Yeah, chocolate make better, baby.” But it wouldn’t, he knew, not really. He needed sleep and for Rien to go to work and come back perfectly safe and sound and then he would be fine again. It was a blow to his ego, to know he still couldn’t adjust to change at all, even when it was change he knew was coming.

Rien and Kippei came over to sit with their own mugs, sitting close as they all shared the warm drink before Kippei had to leave for school. Today of all days he didn’t want to go, and dragged out the almost-peaceful morning until he was running late.

He finally got reluctantly to his feet and kissed them goodbye, giving Shinji an extra tight hug and touching his cheek reassuringly.

“I’ll be home soon,” he promised. And really hoped nothing disastrous happened while he was gone.

“Kay,” Shinji agreed softly, turning to kiss Kippei softly and hugging Hyun-ki tighter in response. He didn’t try to follow and watch Kippei drive out the driveway and down the street, knowing that seeing Kippei behind the wheel right now would just be a recipe for disaster. Instead, he sat quietly and drank his hot chocolate, trying to stay calm and keep his thoughts in order, finally looking over at Rien in stubborn curiosity.

“Is it dangerous?”

Tilting his head, Rien made a considering noise and took another drink of hot chocolate before he answered. “Not particularly. Nobody get hurt this time,” he noted a bit wryly. This bit of sneaking was mainly sabotage, not assassin work this time. He didn’t think it was going to be too difficult and definitely wouldn’t use the word dangerous, even though there was a small chance that it could be.

It was a small relief. Rien always said it wasn’t going to be dangerous, but he’d never said no one would get hurt. That was different and somehow it helped Shinji to nod and take a deep breath and try and think about it sensibly.

“Okay,” he agreed at last, still looking at Rien curiously. “You’re not to bring home any more Yunis!”

Rien shook his head soberly, knowing exactly how much trouble he would be in if he did, not just from his family but from his superiors. They were never going to let him get away with that twice, and he fervently hoped nothing ever went so wrong again that there would even be a question of it. After all, Yuni had been a complete accident. She wasn’t even supposed to be there.

“Won’t bring anythin’ home you ain’t expectin’,” he assured Shinji with a wry smile.  Just the usual little presents he found along the way.

Feeling a little relieved, Shinji finally got up and went to sit in Rien’s lap, still cuddling Hyun-ki in his own, sighing in relief just to have him there, close and safe for the moment.

“Nothing can happen to you. I need you here,” he whispered softly. “I need you with me.”

“I know,” Rien told him gently, stroking his hair and holding them both close. “I know y’do, an’ I always come back to you, promise.” He knew just how much Shinji and Kippei both needed him, and oddly it made him feel warm inside. They all needed each other, just as much. It was still amazing, some days, but he wouldn’t give it up for the world.

Slightly soothed by the promise, Shinji took his time drinking his hot chocolate and soaking up the heat from Rien’s body before he was all done and checked to see that Hyun-ki was finished and hadn’t spilt any on herself.

“Mmm…We should build a cubby house in front of the TV and watch the little mermaid.” It had been his favourite for a while now, not just because Hyun-ki appeared to love it, but because it reminded him of their honeymoon and they day they’d rowed out on the lake.

Rien chuckled softly, amused by Shinji’s affection for the Disney film, but more than willing to watch it with them if that was what they wanted to watch.

“Sure,” he agreed, “I help you. We have us such a good time Kippei be jealous when he get back as he ain’t been here for it,” he noted, smirking, though really it was unlikely that Kippei would be quite that envious over a blanket fort and a movie, but then again Rien knew how badly he wished he could stay here with them instead of going to school.

Kippei being jealous of a sheet fort made Shinji smile and he turned to nuzzle gently at Rien’s throat, unable to express how glad he was just to have Rien in his life, always making things better. He suspected it was a part of the reason he had trouble when Rien wasn’t there; he knew how easily everything would fall apart without him.

“Love you so much Ri. You make me so happy.”

Feeling warm clear through, Rien kissed his temple and snuggled them both, then reached up to tug on a lock of Yuni’s hair.

“Ready for playtime?” he asked her, grinning. They had built blanket forts before, but they had Shinji to help now and he meant to out do themselves this time. They were so going to make Kippei jealous; it was fun.

“Ready!” Hyun-ki agreed with a bright smile, not entirely sure what she was agreeing to but whatever it was, she was ready for it. Rien always had the best ideas.

Shinji just laughed and picked her up, taking her out to the living room and putting her down in the middle before going to fetch all the spare blankets from the cupboard, dumping them in a huge pile. He pulled the couches apart, piling the cushions where they could use them as bricks and then looked down at the large mess with a wide grin.

“This is gonna be the best fort ever,” he muttered to himself, then went about rearranging the furniture to a good configuration to use as pillars.

“That’s the plan,” Rien agreed, sorting through their building materials and planning it out in his head. He draped a sheet over Hyun-ki’s head, grinning as she giggled and tried to find her way out of it, looking like a small ghost as she flailed underneath it.

He snatched it off again, saying “Peekaboo!” and laughing at her as she beamed at him, then tossing it over her head again. He did it a couple more times, both of them laughing like idiots before he finally turned back to the business of constructing their fort.

Caught up in watching them play, thrilled to have a glimpse of their life when he was usually at school and to see them both happy and okay, Shinji relaxed into the creative process of building the fort, helping Rien tie the corners off in various places until they had a dark, enclosed little space in the middle of the living room, decked out with bright pillows and already home to Kiri and Hyun-ki’s large bunny toy. It made Shinji smile, crawling inside their handiwork and flopping down on the pillows.

Hyun-ki crawled in after him, picking up her bunny to cuddle before she settled herself beside Shinji, snuggling in beside him. She held up the bunny so he could inspect the fort, talking softly to him in Korean, explaining what it was so he wouldn’t be scared. He didn’t like small closed in spaces.

Poking his head in and looking around before he came in to join them, Rien smiled wryly as he listened to her soft chatter, shaking his head and wriggling into a spot on the other side of Shinji, sighing in satisfaction and then reaching for the portable dvd player and case of movies they had stashed inside, setting up the player as he handed over the dvds for Shinji to look through and find the one they wanted.

Shinji wasn’t sure what she was saying, but he was concerned by the serious tone of Hyun-ki’s voice, only slightly relieved when Rien didn’t say anything about it, certain he would have interrupted if he had needed to. He flicked through the dvds and found their copy of the little mermaid, reaching out to put it in the player, then wrapping an arm around Hyun-ki and cuddling her close against his side.

“Shinji loves Yuni,” he reassurred her softly.

“Love Shinji!” she agreed, leaning up to kiss his cheek and sighing contentedly as she snuggled under his arm, turning her bunny around so he could watch too. “Movie, Shinshin!” she told him excitedly, pointing at the screen and petting his floppy ears.

Rien glanced sideways at her, slightly amused, having gotten well-acquainted with the bunny by this point. He doubted Shinji had heard it’s name before, and grinned at him with brown eyes full of mischief.

“Looks like you got a namesake, Shin,” he drawled.

Shinji just blinked, looking from his tiger to her bunny and back again, a little baffled. She had to know why he called the tiger Kiri; it was one of the few things she would have understood. That she had named her bunny after him meant he made her feel safe and loved and was her home in the same way Kippei and Rien were his own. It was more than a little mindblowing.

“Really?”

Rien chuckled at the stunned look on his face, leaning over to kiss him softly, wrapping an arm around him as he settled more comfortably against him. Shinji was just terribly cute sometimes, it was as lethal as the rest of him really.

“Yuni,” he said instead of answering, reaching over to tweak the bunny’s ear. “What’s his name?” He repeated the question in both languages just to make sure she understood.

“Shinshin!” she answered immediately, frowning at him because he totally knew that and he was just asking dumb questions like he did sometimes. “Shinshin mine,” she added sternly, just in case he was thinking about taking him away.  Rien liked to play kidnap far too much.

Shinji laughed then, amused and filled with warm heat as he hugged her and Shinshin close. He had never imagined he could be that for anyone, let alone the adorably cute little girl he adored so badly. He had thought it would be Rien she found that connection with, that sense of home and safety. But the bunny was named Shinshin and that was just incredibly awesome.

“Shinshin,” he agreed softly, tweaking one long floppy ear. “Shinshin loves Yuni too.”

“Shhh,” Rien told them as he leaned forward to press play on the dvd. “Watching now,” he ordered, just as if they hadn’t all seen it a hundred times. Movies were meant to be paid attention to, otherwise there was no point in watching them.

Yuni giggled at Rien trying to be stern and leaned up to whisper in Shinji’s ear. “Rin not scary,” she noted amusedly, finding it rather entertaining when he thought he was.

Laughing hard at that, looking over at Rien and grinning, even if he was uncertain if he could agree. Rien was scary. Shinji knew there was a part of Rien capable of murder, if that was what he was ordered to do, but at the same time he knew Rien would never harm him. It was strange, but it wasn’t a bad thing. Rien needed to be a little scary, to take care of their family.

“Mmm yeah, baby. Rien’s not scary at all,” he agreed, not wanting Hyun-ki to find anything scary, ever again. He kissed the top of her head and settled in to watch as Ariel came on screen.