The next morning Kippei had ample cause to regret not having bothered putting on clothes the night before. It was Christmas morning, which Hyun-ki had been excitedly waiting for ever since it had been explained to her that all the shiny tempting presents under the tree were to be opened then, and the night before she had been told that it was finally tomorrow, and she could open the bright enticing packages first thing in the morning.

Accordingly and as children have such a talent for, she woke up bright and early, well before anyone ever got up on a normal day – after dawn, but just barely. She had tiptoed down the hall and hung back anxiously from going into the living room where the tree was when she saw that Yoshi-man and his giant teddy bear were sleeping in there. Yuni wasn’t exactly afraid of them, but she was scared to wake them up and it did make her nervous to think of going in there with them by herself.

After standing forlornly peeking around the corner at the softly blinking lights of the tree for some time, Yuni sighed softly and her bare feet padded noiselessly back down the hall, but she hesitated for a little bit outside the door of the other bedroom. She might get in trouble for waking them up, too, but Shinji at least probably wouldn’t mind. Rien wouldn’t mind either, she knew he was looking forward to presents as much as she was.

She nudged the door open a crack and slipped inside, tiptoeing again over to the edge of the bed nearest the door, apprehensively approaching her sleeping guardians and stretching up to peer at the nearest to see who she would have to wake up. She clutched her bunny tightly and her tiny face showed worried disappointment as she realised it was Kippei. She’d been hopin for Shinji, but Kippei… well, Kippei was the one most likely to mind being woken up, but he was also the boss of everyone and it would be sneaky and cheating to wake someone else up instead, anyway.

A tiny sigh escaped her as she studied him with a small serious face, and if her huge bunny hadn’t required two arms to hold him, she would have been sucking her thumb. Then she squared her tiny shoulders and took a deep breath, raising up on tiptoe again to lean closer to Kippei and whisper as near his ear as she could reach.

“Ki? Ki-tan, is morning…Ki-tan? Yuni awake…” With the stuffed bunny squished against the side of the bed she could free a arm to reach up and pat his bare shoulder with a tiny hand. “Kiiii…Ki, awake!” she insisted, her voice still soft and barely louder than a whisper.

It was Rien who woke almost instantly, and as he had ended up in the middle he was close enough to see her when he turned over and lifted his head to blink sleepily at her.

“Yuni?” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes and reaching over to shake Kippei. “Ki, wake up. You got comp’ny.”

Kippei grunted and made a sleepy interrogative noise, shifting in his sleep and frowning a little when Rien shook him again. “Wha?” he muttered, finally getting his eyes cracked open and peering bemusedly at his way too alert for so early in the morning boyfriend. Rien just nodded at the space behind him, and after Kippei blinked at him confusedly a couple of times, he finally rolled over to look.

“Yuni?” He rubbed his eyes to wake himself up and studied her in concern, worried that she’d had a nightmare or something. It was the usual reason for her coming in here like this, but as he reached down to give her a hand up he realised that her expression wasn’t so much frightened as it was hopeful.

“You okay, baby?” he asked her, tugging her up to sit on top of the blankets beside him and wrapping an arm around her, cuddling her close. She nodded impatiently and threw a glance at Rien for help explaining.

“Kistmas toree, Ki!” she reminded him, her brown eyes wide and pleading. “Kistmas morning! Presens! Now yes? Good?”

Kippei chuckled and relaxed back onto his pillow, yawning a little and rubbing his face with his hand. “Ahh, that.” Relieved that she hadn’t had a bad dream, the slight adrenaline rush faded and he felt sleep tugging at him again, making his eyelids heavy as he shifted onto his side facing her and snuggled back against Rien to give her more room to sit. “Dunno,” he told her around another yawn, “s’awful early.”

“Talking,” Shinji grumbled softly from the far side of the bed, dragging the pillow over his head and burrowing in under it, hiding from the smudge of soft light coming in under the curtains. His eyes were still sensitive when he first woke up and he had never been a morning person to begin with. “Shut up, it’s not morning!” He complained, the words muffled by the pillow. He was almost back to sleep when he realised that was a girl’s voice, and it certainly hadn’t been Rien. He sat up then, long hair loose and a wild mess around him, sticking to the blankets and pillows and his skin as he blearily blinked at the sight in front of him. Hyun-ki sitting beside his two lovers, looking way too awake and hopeful for first thing in the morning.

“Yuni?” He looked questioningly at Kippei and Rien, and then froze, heat flooding through him, cheeks burning dark red, the flush fast sweeping down his throat and across his chest until he was sure he was on fire. He was certain he had never been so embarrassed.

“Oh god.” Yuni, happily seated beside his very naked lovers.

It didn’t occur to Rien that Shinji would be embarrassed when everyone was covered up nice and decent by the sheets, but Kippei heard the tone of voice and gave him a look of mild concern.

“Shin?” He pulled the sheets a little higher and tucked them safely around himself and Rien, glancing at Yuni’s oblivious and brightly hopeful face and half-smiling in wry amusement. “She’s on top of the covers,” he pointed out. “Relax, lover.”

Rien looked bemusedly over at Shinji, belatedly realising what Shinji was freaking out about. “I’m sorry,” he apologised, feeling guilty as if it were all his fault even though Kippei was naked too, underneath the covers. “I ain’t thought about…” Having a little girl very possibly coming in to wake them up for Christmas so early in the morning. “Sorry.”

Shinji wasn’t just embarrassed about them, at all. If anything he was more embarrassed about the fact he only had a shirt on. If he tried to get out of the bed, he would be okay, since Kippei’s shirt reached his knees, but it just felt wrong having no underwear on with Yuni right there on the bed with them. He bit back a small, hysterical laugh and curled in against Rien’s back, hiding while he tried to force the blush to go away.

“Morning Princess Yuni.”

She craned her neck to see him hiding there, giving him a curious look, slightly concerned. “Shinji? Shinji okay? Kistmas, Shinji!” she told him excitedly, wondering if he had missed that part and was trying to go back to sleep. “Kistmas now, Shinji awake!”

Rien smothered his laughter against Kippei’s back, reaching behind him for Shinji’s hand and tucking it around his waist, covering it with his own and holding it against his stomach.

“You’re so damn cute, Shin,” he murmured, still smiling as he rubbed the back of Shinji’s hand soothingly with his thumb.

Shinji groaned but squeezed Rien’s hand, pulling as much comfort from the touch as he could before forcing himself to sit up, reaching out with a smile to tug gently on Hyun-ki’s hair.

“Yeah, pretty girl, I know, it’s Christmas and present time.” Oh how he knew what little girls were like on Christmas morning, but he’d never felt so damn old before! He moved cautiously to the edge of the bed, checked that the shirt was covering him and then hurriedly went to the closet, hiding inside while he tugged on some jeans, sighing in relief as he did up the zip, covered. He emerged with a blush still dark on his cheeks, but went and picked up Hyun-ki, kissing her good morning and smiling brightly at her in her yellow duck pyjamas with her matching giant bunny. She was the cutest thing in the world, and he knew it would kill him to lose her now.

“My Yuni.”

She beamed at him and kissed his cheek exuberantly. “Shinji awake! Yay, Shinji!” She cuddled in against him, delighted that someone was finally up and paying attention to her, especially when it was Shinji. She laid her head on his shoulder and wound her tiny arms around his neck, still a little bit concerned about him.

“Shinji okay? Love Shinji!” she assured him, as if that made everything better.

“Shinji loves Yuni,” Shinji agreed. “I’m fine, beautiful.” He kissed the top of her head and then turned to eye Kippei and Rien warily, finding them extremely sexy with the sheets wound tight over their hips and delicious skin everywhere else, but also very aware that Hyun-ki could have walked in with the sheet down much lower. They couldn’t put a lock on the door in case she hurt herself or had a nightmare or something, but at the same time he didn’t want to traumatize her. He sighed, not sure what to do about it and carried her out, pausing in the doorway to give them a stern look.

“Clothes!” It was all he bothered to say, carrying Hyun-ki out to go wake up Toshio and Enishi.

Rien chuckled, nuzzling into Kippei for a minute and then rolling him onto his back for a lazy, lingering good morning kiss. It felt good, just to know that they would wake up next to each other every morning, him and Kippei and Shinji, that Yuni might come running in to wake them but they would all be together, always, and every morning he could have this, if he wanted it, soft warm kisses and affection and contentment, even if he might have to chase Shinji down to get his, still knowing that he wouldn’t be denied if he asked.

“Love you,” he murmured, rubbing Kippei’s belly and smoothing his hand over the hard, strong chest muscles, luxuriating in Kippei’s strength as much as he did Shinji’s slender grace. They were both gorgeously sexy in their own way, and he simply couldn’t believe how incredibly lucky he was sometimes. This was his, they were both his, and if it had been a high price to pay and in some ways they were still paying it, he still felt it was worth it, so, so grateful that he was a part of something so amazing, so warm and wonderful and good.

Kippei chuckled at him, kissing him back briefly and then pulling away, rolling out of bed and slapping his ass affectionately, pretending to be stern.

“Get up, sleepyhead. Christmas morning!” he reminded Rien, and Rien scrambled up, almost forgetting that he needed clothes and comically skidding to a halt as Kippei called him back. “Clothes first,” he ordered, pointing to the closet, and Rien grinned sheepishly at him as he padded in and found a pair of ripped jeans and a tight, stretchy shirt that clung to his chest and showed off his muscles.

“Better?” he asked, smirking, and Kippei rolled his eyes.

“Tease,” he grumbled as he pulled on his own clothes, and Rien grinned, wide and sunny. Score. He wandered out to the living room to find Shinji and get the rest of his good morning kisses.

Shinji gaped. He wasn’t sure that was any better than coming out naked, especially since he just wanted to take the damn clothes back off and lick and his brain was so not working now. He put Hyun-ki down on the fold out bed beside Enishi, trusting him to catch her if she tried to crawl off the side, and immediately reached for Rien, running his palm down his chest and smirking a little, amused by it in the end, letting his fingers tangle in the empty belt hoops.

“Mmm is this my christmas present? Can I unwrap it now?”

“Anytime, princess,” Rien assured him, purring with delight at Shinji’s reaction and looping his arms around Shinji’s shoulders, pulling him in for warm, sexy good morning kisses. He licked at the corners of Shinji’s mouth and nudged his way in, eagerly searching out the sweet, intoxicating flavor of Shinji’s mouth.

“God, you taste so good,” he sighed in contentment.

“Rien!” Shinji whined breathlessly. “We have guests!” He frowned when he managed to pull himself free, looking nervously over at the bed, but Hyun-ki was sitting on the edge, looking up at them with wide eyes and a silly smile on her face and he couldn’t be mad with anything in the world. “Fine, fine, it’s time to open real presents!” He picked Hyun-ki up and put her down under the tree and sitting beside her, grabbing the first one and smiling, handing it over to her.

“This one’s for Rien.”

Enishi had gotten up and headed down to the bathroom to change, but Toshio was moving slower, having pushed himself into a sitting position and yawning, but still sitting there blinking sleepily at everyone. By the time Enishi came back he had nearly fallen asleep again, and Enishi picked him up without comment and placed him in an armchair so he could straighten the sheets on the fold out bed and put it away.

While he was doing that, Kippei wandered in and went over to Shinji as if drawn by a magnet, stroking his hair and leaning down to kiss it before he folded himself down to sit crosslegged beside him.

Rien watched them with a silly, adoring smile on his face, and moved over to sit on the couch once it was a couch again. Hyun-ki came over to give him the present Shinji had chosen, holding it out with both hands and giving him a look of hopeful curiosity. He grinned and picked her up, settling her in his lap while he took the present and shook it, holding it up to his ear as if he could tell what it was by the sound.

“Hmmm, it’s from Shinji… what could be that, now?” he mused, giving Yuni a conspiratorial look.

Shinji just snorted and looked away, not wanting to be embarrassed if Rien didn’t like it, even if Shinji knew he would since that one was just a box of new games for the various consoles they had. The more personal gifts were toward the back of the tree. Still, he busied himself tossing presents around the room; a few at Enishi and Toshio, then some at Kippei, a small pile at his own side and a rather embarrassingly large one for Hyun-ki to attack whenever she noticed. There were others, for the rest of the family, that stayed in a neat pile under the tree.

When the sorting was done, Shinji sat back against Kippei and just let it sink in that it was Christmas; that he was living with Kippei and Rien and Yuni, and he had a life even more full than the one he’d once dreamt of. It still hurt, knowing how much was gone, but it wasn’t the horrible, all-consuming pain it used to be, blunted now to a dull, vague throb that he mostly ignored.

“I love you.”

“More than anything,” Kippei agreed, smiling softly as he wrapped his arm around Shinji and held him close against his side. It felt warm and comfortable and good with Shinji tucked under his arm and everyone smiling and happy, ready to open presents and Rien and Hyun-ki doing a concentrated detective inspection on theirs before they opened them, Rien showing her all the tricks for figuring out what something was through the wrapping.

Shinji just snickered, of the opinion Rien was, in some ways, no older than Hyun-ki, but happy that was the case. He loved watching the two of them being silly together, both of them smiling like it was the best day of their lives and who knew, maybe it was. Shinji quietly curled in against Kippei, picking up one of the presents and curiously feeling it out before shrugging, no closer to knowing what it was and tearing it open at one end. A silk scarf in a myriad shades of blue slid free and piled in his lap and he picked it up with wide eyes that only seemed bluer beside the soft cloth as he examined the ornate design threaded through with navy lines.

“Who…” He shook his head, not even caring because it was beautiful and perfect and he quickly wrapped it over his hair and tied it at the back, letting it hang loose down his back and smoothing it into place at the front, completely in love with it already.

Kippei grinned, thinking he looked adorable and sexy and fantastic in it. It had been from Rien, but Rien had good taste, as usual. Shinji had almost as many presents as Hyun-ki, as both of them liked to spoil him, but one of the ones Kippei was particularly looking forward to his reaction was a rather bulky package that was rectangular and squishy and soft.

He dropped it in Shinji’s lap with an expectant look, and sat back to watch him open it – high quality silky satin sheets, two sets – ivory and red. It was a silly, whimsical gift, but it seemed… like Shinji, somehow, and Kippei was desperately hoping he would like them.

Curious, Shinji just looked at him for a minute but when no further clue came he found himself just staring at the gift with a ridiculous smile on his face because it was from Kippei, and Kippei looked so excited to see him open it. Feeling warm and adored he carefully unfolded the wrapping paper and laid out the gift, eyes going wide as he pulled the sheets free and stared at the deep red and crisp ivory then he was tugging the red packet open and sliding his hand in over the satin, moaning at the soft feel of them; the sexy, slinky way his skin slid over cloth.

“Kippei…” He hugged them to him and turned to grin at him, because bed had never seemed so thoroughly inviting as it did then. “They’re amazing!”

Relieved, Kippei relaxed and grinned at him, slipping an arm around him and kissing his temple. “Glad you like them,” he said simply, looking forward to putting them to good use. He picked up another soft, tissue wrapped package and threw it at Rien’s head, chuckling as Rien barely managed to catch it before it hit him in the face.

“Yours,” he told Rien, and Rien looked curiously at it, turning it around in his hands. “Hmmm,” he murmured, squeezing it here and there to feel the texture and weight of it, knowing it was clothing but not sure what.

“Just open it,” Kippei told him dryly, not having the patience Rien did for just toying with things. Rien gave him an impish smirk, but he did finally settle down to tearing the wrapping off, letting it fall and holding up… a dress. A slinky, slippery sultry evening dress, in fact, one that had to have cost several hundred dollars. Rien would have scolded him for folding it up and just wrapping it like any ordinary thing, but he was too stunned, just staring at it.

It was a warm, honey colored gold that he knew looked damn good on him, and Kippei must have gotten it tailored somewhere because it was clearly made for someone with no chest at all, in a style that would be flattering all the same, and it was fitted to the waist from which it flared gently to the floor. Rien was absolutely speechless.

It was Yuni that reached out to touch it, petting the slippery fabric and giggling softly when it slipped out of her hand. “Pretty, Ri! Pretty!”

Enishi snorted softly from where he was sitting in the big armchair with Toshio in his lap, completely amused by it, shaking his head a little. Kippei had himself a couple of oddballs, to be sure; cute as they were, they were damn weird sometimes, but he seemed to be doing just fine with them.

Shinji was gaping at it, and damn near watering at the mouth, wanting to see Rien in it, but not when they had guests. He wanted to see him dance around in it, and then he wanted to strip it off him and run his hands over skin and cloth and the luxurious textures of each.

“Damn,” he whispered to himself, shifting his position slightly to one less embarrassing when he felt himself stirring a little in interest. He forced himself to go through Kippei’s pile of presents, finding one he wanted and handing it over with a small, worried frown, not sure he would like it at all. Kippei was hard to buy for and a lot of the things he’d thought of Kippei already had, but Shinji had found a black leather belt with two chains artfully falling from one side and from each one hung a small angel with a crystal in it’s chest, one red and one blue.

Kippei opened it carefully, picking apart the wrapping as if it mattered how badly it got ripped and slowly uncovering the belt, pulling it out and holding it up to take a better look at the tiny angel figures hanging from it. A slow, warm smile with a touch of wryness crossed his face, and he touched each angel’s head gently with a fingertip, caressing them affectionately. One pink and red, one silver and blue, his angels – Shinji and Rien. God, Shinji knew him too well.

Swallowing hard, he lowered them to cradle in his lap, stroking the smooth, buttery leather of the belt itself and smiling foolishly, shaking his head a little and leaning over to give Shinji a warm thank you kiss in place of the words that wouldn’t come.

The look on Kippei’s face was perfect and Shinji relaxed completely, wrapping his arms around him and hugging him close, cradling him gently and kissing him over and over until they fell backward and he had to laugh, filled with happy delight because Kippei liked one of his presents. He was amused that they’d all apparently been a little worried, which was silly really when they all knew each other so well.

“So you can carry us around with you all day.”

“It’s perfect,” Kippei assured him, hugging him tight and kissing him again. Carrying them around with him all day was exactly what he always wanted, and while this wasn’t the real thing, it was enough to make him smile and feel warm inside and that was all that mattered, really.

Rien helped get Hyun-ki settled on the floor, surrounded by her sea of presents, encouraging her to start opening them. She looked a little overwhelmed, but Rien walked her through the first couple, assuring her that they were all for her and she gradually relaxed and had fun ripping the paper off of games and toys and shiny things, a few books but mostly things that needed no translation – they were fun, pure and simple. Bright and pretty and awesome, and she was soon happily exclaiming and chattering and trying things out, playing with them as she went, wide eyed and awed at some of them, puzzled by a good many, transparently delighted with others.

Everything a little girl could need, or want as the case might be, covered a lot of ground, apparently.

“When her birthday comes around there won’t be anything left to give her,” Toshio observed softly, looking wry and amused.

“I thought you knew Rien?” Shinji rolled his eyes, grinning at the pile of paper growing higher behind Hyun-ki and the large pile of new toys. “Just as long as Bunny is still her favourite,” he groused lightly at Rien, but it was clear he was joking. Just because Kiri was his favourite did not mean he would ever push his own insecurities onto her, or his need for such a ridiculous security blanket.

He grinned then, reaching for another present and tossing it at Rien; a rose gold hand-crafted celtic arm band with flawless engraving, cast from a set based on the Book of Kells and inset with a thin stripe of titanium that matched Rien’s wedding rings. He wasn’t sure Rien would like it but an arm band was sure as hell something Rien did not own. Not to mention it would look damn sexy; Rien had amazingly well sculpted but toned arms and Shinji was of the opinion they needed to be visible more often. He was just giving incentive, really.

Rien’s grin split his face, because hell yeah it would look sexy, and he had half a dozen outfits that would show it off perfectly, plus it would give him an excuse to drag Shinji out to clubs more often. It was gorgeous and perfect and he tackled Shinji to smother him with kisses.

“Love you so much,” he whispered in Shinji’s ear, not because it was embarrassing but just because with guests present he didn’t want it to be a careless thing, too casual; it was serious and private, and he wanted Shinji to know he meant it.

He reached for another small box in return, handing it to Shinji – jewelry for jewelry seemed like a good trade. This one was an incentive too, or rather a strong nudge. Maybe a… well, not a demand, but a hopeful request at the very least. It was a set of earrings and a choker that matched Shinji’s tiara, a glittering waterfall of diamonds that looked much more expensive than they were, and the choker had sapphires scattered in a pattern among the glinting white stones. Rien knew Shinji would at least like the choker, but he was kind of hoping that he would agree to get his ears pierced so he could wear the earrings too.

Shinji opened them and then just sat there, fascinated. He never, not in a million years, would have thought anyone would ever give him earrings. After a minute he picked them up and examined them, imagining how they would shift and sit, how they would hang and he had to admit they were spectacularly beautiful and weirdly seemed to be real diamonds, glittering in the light. He glanced over at Rien, worrying his lower lip nervously before putting them away carefully with the choker.

“You can do them later. I won’t let anyone else.” He didn’t trust anyone else to hurt him without damaging him. Rien could stick a needle in the back of his head without hurting him, he could pierce his ears.

Rien’s sun smile beamed out at him, relieved and delighted. “Sure,” he agreed readily, reaching for Shinji’s hand and squeezing it hard. “If you sure you want to, I do it for you.” He didn’t want Shinji to do it only for him, but he hoped Shinji would tell him if he didn’t really want it. Rien would have to ask him later, before they actually did it.

Kippei cleared his throat and pulled out another one for Shinji, this one flat and square and quite obviously a book of some kind. He took a deep breath and bit his lip as he handed it over. It was a small leatherbound journal with heavy cream pages and the cover was framed to hold a picture. Kippei had gotten Rien to take one of them one day while he was holding Shinji and Shinji was sleeping.

Inside the first page was already covered with writing. It said, Shinji – this isn’t to replace the journal that you lost, it doesn’t have to be for that. I just wanted you to have a place to write things down, if you want to – good things too, for memories. This one is just for you, to keep anything you want in and you never have to show it to anyone at all, if you don’t want to. You do get to have secrets too, and I wanted to give you from me a place to keep them. 

No matter what they are or if you ever want to share them, always remember I still love you, more than anything. 

Kippei’s scrawled signature was at the bottom, along with a hesitation mark that looked as if he’d thought about adding a postscript, and didn’t.

Shinji froze when he unwrapped it, staring at the picture and blinking back tears, opening it to read the inscription, stunned beyond any sort of real comprehension. He had to close it again just to get his brain to work but his gaze fell on the cover and all he could do was stare. After a while his fingers shakily stroked the photo and he looked wonderingly at them both, a little fascinated.

Kippei looked as flawless as ever; just the sexiest man Shinji had ever seen, but the way he held him screamed how much he was loved and sent a shiver through Shinji. But it was seeing himself that was odd; himself through Rien’s camera lense, relaxed and held firm against Kippei, dark hair spread out around them like a blanket, long dark lashes against flawless white skin and he found himself staring at it for far longer than he would have thought and knew he would spend even longer, later, doing the same thing.

This was how they saw him, and if he didn’t know any better he would have sworn it wasn’t him, but he knew it was.

“I…I look…” Beautiful. Like they always said.

“You look like My Shinji,” Kippei told him with a crooked smile, letting his breath out in silent relief and reaching up to touch his cheek, a gentle fluttering caress. The picture had come out even better than he’d hoped, but Rien was kind of a genius like that, capturing what he felt as much as what he saw, and the beauty and the love in it was obvious.

“My Shinji!” Hyun-ki interrupted worriedly, coming over to stand beside Shinji and reaching for him anxiously. “My Shinji, my Shinji!”

Rien dissolved into laughter, collapsing into Kippei’s lap and burying his face in him. “My Shinji too!” he chimed in, reaching over to claim Shinji’s hand and squeezing it hard, still laughing because it was so damn amusing, but he meant it as much as they did.

Months of pent up fear bled out in a moment and Shinji grabbed at Kippei, clinging desperately to him even as he pulled Hyun-ki into his lap and hugged her too, crying but not even sure why. He was happy; much happier than he remembered being in a while, but there was sadness there too. Ultimately he’d been given a gift and it meant the world to him; the right to keep his own secrets, to have his own thoughts and write them down and not have to explain something if he didn’t want to. The chance to have something that was just his. But also, proof that they trusted him to figure things out his own way and get better, while still being completely theirs.

“Mine,” he agreed. His perfect family.